maybe this time I'll win
begin anew and knock down my walls
failing to become famous overall
taller than my problems
but shorter than my actions
pressuring for reaction
from people
that's been attacking
actuality always creeps from beneath the night
I'm eager to clear my sight
but my pupils are clouded
sounds of happiness from my front window
the people above me are aroused
while I'm down
I'm not sad
just not happy either
I guess that's what Cobain said when he pulled the trigger
figures that being this lonely
can hurt this bad
but if you ignore pain long enough
it'll ignore itself.
so hello white walls
carpet floor
that mysterious gust of wind
that dances underneath my front door
talk to me
I'm all ears
I close my eyes
because I'm scared of fear
my tear buckets
are filled w nothing here
so I'm allowed to suffer
my shirt is wrinkled in odd places
my shoes are covered in bad rubber
from walking the middle of roads
hoping someone at least notice my
depression laying over me
cloaked but it's still a cover
i found something worth dying for again
but this time it really ain't no better
then walking outside
w a turtle neck
shorts on and flip flops
in below cold weather
pressure from TVs social networks
and crazy dreams
like tryna find the right path to my goals
when it's right under me
100 secrets in my head
hiding from the light
delight in talking to a mirror
because it's the only person that might
send a smile back or care enough
to push a hello out the crack of it's soul
colder than Everest
she was in control
I lost hope when I didn't see her glow
paralyzed
no concentration
sad w no hesitation
i guess the nation
of sorrow swam my way
im generous
Yet full of lost anger
from things beyond danger
misplaced feelings falling from peaks
of hollow angels
couldn't control my angles
thought I said the truth
but she took it like a stranger
fame or fortune
I have neither
but a warm heart
And dusty shoes
is what I breath for
simplicity in my lungs
that's all I scream for
grab my hand
kiss my forehead
Tell me it's ok
trouble seems much easier
when you whisper it that way
maybe I'm beyond sentimental
but they say I'm a rebel w no cause
when really I'm just being experimental
hope you see the shallow smile
that glides across my face
my eyes turn gold in the summer
only towards big butts and nature
my motives are too simple
my granny told me
that's why they hate ya
so I thank the trees leaves branches birds
And greens that I walk along
to find peace
that's better for me
because when i think deep thoughts of myself
im convinced that I'm crazier than what seems.
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